When I first received ‘permission’ to embark on a new aspect of my spiritual path, I consulted an oracle as to what my first step should be. The answer was simple enough, ‘shut your mouth’. This could mean one of many things and I have been thinking about it and it’s various meanings ever since. Maybe I talk too much, maybe I presume too much, perhaps it is my time to be a student and not a teacher; or maybe I need to cultivate silence within.
Most of my adolescent life has been plagued with horrible mouth ulcers and this has worsened as I have aged due to some underlying medical causes. Whilst they are unpleasant, I am used to them. However right now I have three huge ones; two on my lips and one on my tongue which is extreme even for me.
It hurts to talk and it hurts to eat. It hurts even to open my mouth at all. It occurred to me today in meditation that through this pain I can learn the value of silence.
When it hurts to talk, every word must be measured for it’s worth before it is spoken. Mindless chatter gives way to silent contemplation and listening.
When it hurts to eat, I eat only what my body requires and find myself inclined to fast.
I wonder if I have these three ulcers for a reason. Maybe they are the gods way of showing me the value of shutting my mouth.
Things are starting to fit together now that I am receptive.